I've got a XDM 9mm and ust can't get a comfortable grip. I have average size hands but have the number 3 backstrap on, and still have a couple problems. The first problem is the grip is just too thin side to side, I can't get a good grip. My second problem is even with the large backstrap my trigger hits the middle of my finger, I find myself having to pull my finger back out of the guard alittle to keep the trigger on the first pad of my finger. What am I doing wrong? I'm not new to pistols, been shooting IDPA and USPSA for years, but not with this gun.