one-eyed-fatman said:
They'll never take me alive!
That's the attitude I should have had!!!!!!
They got me cold! Red-handed. Pants down. Hand in the cookie jar. Guilty as sin, associating with known undesirables. I was a bad seed and born under a bad sign. Bad to the bone and the kid your mothers warned you about. (Other than that an all around good guy). LOL
Dragnet theme plays here for just a few bars. Opening scene, 1970 Ford Galaxy..tan with black-wall tires kicking up dust at 80 mph on two lane country road. Helicopter shot closing in on arm nonchalantly hanging out driver's side window.
Titles roll. Music changes to Jimi Hendix rendition of Voodoo Chile. As song fades sound of police car siren comes up and "Directed by Quentin Tarentino" fills screen superimposed on dolly shot of Big Bad Delija in starched white button down shirt. Tie loosened in menacing fashion and cheap sport jacket draped over passenger side of front seat.
Pack of Marlboro on dashboard, Styrofoam McDonalds Big Mac container subtle give away this is a period piece.
Music fades out. Close up of Delija sweating in un-airconditioned car. Sound of his rapid heartbeat keeping time with undulating sound of police car siren.
Title pixalates on screen and forms into translucent lettering that reads
"Based on true story. Somewhere east of Boulder Colorado 1972"
Dolly camera trucks around car to get head on shot of Delija through windshield wiping sweat off brow with starched white shirt. Boulder foothills in background. Continental Divide looming in the distance with Long's Peak covered with snow and the Arapaho Glacier dominating the skyline behind Delija's speeding generic looking car. Tan in color. Everything in drab tan except for crystal blue sky and Delija's blood red ties. Drab tan road, vegetation, (mostly scrub brush). Bleak and dusty look to everything. Delija himself looks drab tan. His dirty blond hair, his suntanned face, His white shirt dingy from sweat and dust.
Sound effects fade. Real sounds of rubber meeting the road come up. Car slowing. Comes to a complete stop.
Static filled AM car radio playing Eagles "Desperado" heard for a few bars as camera goes to close up shot of Delija's hand turning off radio as he says "****!" to himself. Close up shot of Delija's eyes looking up-ward. Cut to rear view mirror with County Sheriff's car image clearing as dust settles. Cut back to D. taking half smoked reefer out of ashtray, looks at it with disgust and says to himself "I gotta stop picking up hitchhikers" as he's apparently deciding whether or not to put it in his mouth and swallow it, and then crumples it and wedges it in seat cushion.
Exterior POV shot from beside Ford as Sheriff waddles toward Delija's car. Camera catches two motorcycles as they pass going in opposite direction. One motorcycle dude wearing fringed leather jacket and floppy cowboy hat. Other dude wearing helmet and jacket both with American flag that matches his gas tank. On the back of the flag guy's bike is passenger wearing 1950s style football helmet flapping his arms like a bird. Motorcycles fade into distance and cop walks up to Delija's window. Just then the camera slows as a 1974 Chevy Malibu passes....the anachronism of the year of the car in scene designated as taking place in 1972 is subtly not lost on Delija.... quick cut to Delija's face shows look of brief confusion that gives way to resignation. Camera cuts back in super slo-mo to very brief glance of Vincent Vega's ponytail and Jules Winfield's afro in Malibu for a brief moment...just long enough for the glimpse of the two characters in the car. As soon as the car passes, normal camera speed resumes and from behind Ray Ban mirrored aviator shaped sunglasses trooper says with western drawl "License and registration pad-ner".
Titles roll again. Completely different feel to film. Very documentary in tone. Title scrolls up and says "Directed by Oliver Stone" (in smaller print says "with special appreciation to guest director QT for opening sequence"
Movie starts in ernest.
Again "True Story" splashes on screen but now all cameras are POV of first person (Delija himself). We now see only what he sees. We hear what he thinks. Stone sets out to be Orson Wells possibly pushed along by his weight problem. LOL.
Lunch time for real life Delija ends. Story must pick up pace. D. comes back from filmaking fantasy world (one of the three main worlds he spends much of his free time in...others are as the replacement and superior musician who takes over for Jimmy Page in Led Zepplin, and the other is as the Jewsih Willie Mays (Delija Maysberg), who finishes his career with a grand slam home run (#716) in the bottom of the ninth inning of the seventh game of the world series for the Mets who trailed the hated Yankees by three runs with two outs before the blast that is heard round the universe!!!
"The Bad Seed" rolls:
1972, Pre-computer in cop cars days:
Worked for a large company. Got hired in NY, and assigned to go train in the Chicago branch.
After 8 months or so they sent me to do my job in Denver. Loaded up my company car, and drove from Chicago to Denver. One look at Denver and I knew I couldn't live there. Cow town! Got a place in Boulder and commuted.
First week I'm there I didn't know my way around. I looked at a map and thought I found a shortcut to someplace I had to go.
Driving on two lane highway in the middle of nowhere. Cop car coming in opposite direction gets me for speeding on radar. I was very impressed...I didn't know radar could do that.
He asks for license and registration. I hand him my NY driver's license. He asks me if this is my present address. Told him I just got to Boulder, and had not had a chance yet to get a new license. He then asks me how come I'm driving a car with Illinois plates. I tell him. Company car.
He tells me plates on Illinois car are expired. I tell him I had no idea. There was no date or sticker....IIRC in those days they just changed colors every year. Whatever....he seemed to know the plates were expired. I didn't.
NY license, he didn't like that. Allegedly expired Illinois plates. He didn't like that. Speeding in Colorado. He most definitely didn't like that.
Handcuffs behind my back. Hurt like hell as he'd stomp on the gas after each stop. Plus they were tight. He seemed to like that a lot.
Brought to Boulder County Muni center on Walnut St.. Put in little cage by the reception desk of the Sheriff's office. It was like Barney Miller.
I'm all alone in this little cell waiting for the judge to arraign me. I was there maybe an hour or so. While there I couldn't stop laughing. First they drag some guy in jail clothes to the front desk. He was a trustee and had a mop and a bucket. They brought him to the front because he had a phone call from his wife's lawyer. I hear his side of the conversation. He's apparently behind on child support payments and the lawyer is threatening him. I hear him tell the lawyer "What are you gonna do? Put me in jail?"....then he hangs up on the guy and all the cops are laughing.
They brought me a bowl of soup.
Sheriff's deputies are coming and going. There's a wall of little lockers. These cops come in and get their guns out of these lockers. They leave and they put the guns in the lockers.
I'm watching this and a HUGE, and I mean HUGE guy with a different looking uniform walks in, opens a locker and takes out a tiny little gun.
I ask him...."Hey, how come your gun is so little and all the other guys have really big guns?"
Guy walks over to me and explains that he isn't a regular deputy, he's an auxiliary deputy. He tells me he does this in the off season to make some extra dough. I ask (or he tells me) about his REAL JOB. He's a football player. Plays for the Denver Broncos.
Me, I don't know squat about the Denver Broncos. They are an AFL team that's been in the NFL for what? two years? Only thing I knew about them was they didn't hava logo on their helmets like norman teams (the Browns were the same...but they were a real team.Had the best football player ever. He was a high school player in the next town over from where I grew up. Jim Brown was so good he was the first player college player I ever was aware of. Jim Brown! Hall of Fame. Actor. Sex pervert.
I ask him his name. Lyle Alzedo. I never heard of him.
I most definitely heard of him in the following seasons.
I am pretty sure he even made enough money after that to not need to work as an auxiliary cop by the hour. LOL.
After that, about 10 guys in jail clothes are handcuffed to each other. They open the cell and cuff me to the last guy in line. We get marched into the courthouse across the quad. I get uncuffed. The other guys stay chained to each other.
Finally the clerk calls my name. Judge reads charges and asks me if I had an altercation with the arresting officer. "No sir".
Judge asks me if my Illinois license plates are expired. "I don't know your honor".
Judge dismisses stuff except speeding ticket, which I pay, and tells me to get a Colorado driver's license. "Yes sir, your honor".
Wife (girlfriend at the time, as she was for the following five years) picks me up and we go to get the company car out of impound. It was very expensive, so I put it on my expense report and the company paid for it. Which was nice.
Fifteen years later, also in Boulder, but in a different lifetime altogether (everything is different except for girlfriend who is now wife) I go skeet shooting out in the boonies with my friends. We get ticketed for shooting in the wrong place. We had to go to court, but the DA was one of our poker buddies so the charges were dropped.
Apparently Brickboy must have been in the neighborhood at the time. We were shooting in a place that was ankle deep in spend cartridges and shotgun shells. It was a popular place to shoot. Until someone (and after all these years of mystery finally have a likely suspect) decided to shoot in the opposite direction. They shot some big game cows. So a TV camera was mounted on a power line pole and when we started shooting a cop car appeared out of the dust and gave us the tickets. Damn Brickboy.....if we didn't know the ADA we could have been in trouble!!!!
Other than that, I've been an upstanding citizen. Except some asshat with the same name as me committed unauthorized trades as a stockbroker and my license has had his "crime" listed on it since 1991. Somehow the NASD has the same offense on both our records. The government agencies are just like the government. They acknowledge on my license that it is mistaken identity, but they cannot remove the thing from my permanent record! Morons!....
I talked to the NASD lawyer who prosecuted the guy with my name. He has one of those Czech names with no vowels that you can't know how to pronounce by reading it.
I told him I should change my name to a name like his....mine is a common name. That way I wouldn't be at risk for mistaken identity. He told me that a big time sleaze ball pornographer in NYC with a long criminal record has the same name as him and he is constantly harassed by both law enforcement and Christian fundamentalists. LOL
Well, I never was into "dull". Life has always been interesting.
Poor Lyle Alzedo....I cried when I saw the pubic service TV message he made warning against steroid use before he died from it. I'm sure some of you remember. He always had a big bad guy image, but I always remembered him as a very young and very large guy with a tiny "toy" gun.
Peace,
D.