When she doesn't put out

[SgtWKPII]

(This was written by a guy... it's pretty damn smart).


I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men
and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.



FOR EXAMPLE:

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the
passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I don't feel like it,
I just want you to hold me.'

I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that about?!'



So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to
hear...'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough
for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.'



She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for
who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'



Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.



The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her.
We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed
department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different
very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told he r
we'd just buy them all. She wanted shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.'

We went on to the jeweler department where she picked out a pair of diamond
earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was
one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.



I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.'

She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling
with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all dear,
let's go to the cashier.'

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't feel
like it.'

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled,
'WHAT?'

I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a w hile.
You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to
satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.'

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I
added,” Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I
buy you?'

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least she knows I'm smarter than her.

[Trevor45ACP]

Brilliant!!

[studlee]

Now that's awesome! I just sent that too my wife to read. She got a good kick out of it.

[tomfoolery]

HAHAHA...nice

[tjg4]

Looks like he's single again! LOL

[Steve_o113]

See hookers are cheaper!

[rl168]

Originally Posted by Steve_o113

See hookers are cheaper!

[Nancy1340]

Originally Posted by Steve_o113

See hookers are cheaper!

Not by the time you pay the doctor bill and the bail.

[Wired]

That's great!!!

[jtkratzer]

Excellent! I sent this around and can't wait for the responses.