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04-19-2008, 06:20 PM
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XDTalk 1K Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: NE Illinois
Posts: 1,703
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Yo Mama Alternatives...
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs...
floating in the pool? Bob on the side of a hill? Cliff at the beach? Sandy on the living room wall? Art in a pot on the stove? Stu in your mailbox? Bill at your front door? Matt at the quarry? Rocky holding down a railroad tie? Spike under the car? Jack in a pile of leaves? Russell on the BBQ? Frank on the kitchen shelf? Herb sick on the roller coaster? Ralph with a million bucks? Rich sitting in the bath room? John stuck in a forest fire? Bernie at the bottom of the tub? Duane playing baseball? Homer in a sandwich? Reuben holding up a bank? Rob in a hole? Doug at the hospital? Ward What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef What do you do with a dog with no legs? Take him for a drag What do you call a dog with no legs? Nothing, he won't come anyway Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him. What do you say to a one-legged lady hitchhiker? Hop in! What's her name? Eileen If she were Asian? Irene What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk
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There is a principle which is a bar against all information, which is proof against all arguments and which cannot fail to keep a man in everlasting ignorance— that principle is contempt prior to investigation. - Herbert Spencer ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ "The inherent vice of Capitalism is the unequal distribution of blessings, the inherent vice of Socialism is the equal distribution of misery." - Sir Winston Churchill Last edited by jmichna : 04-19-2008 at 07:09 PM. Reason: Corrected typos |
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04-19-2008, 06:26 PM
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#2 |
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XDTalk 1K Member
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This is a perilous time, and more than ever, the world needs a united and strong America. If, God forbid, we live to see Mr. Obama president, we will live through a socialist era that America has not seen before, and our country will be weakened in every way. - Jon Voight |
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04-19-2008, 07:08 PM
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#3 |
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XDTalk 100 Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: FAR-- Nor-Cal
Posts: 160
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whats the sexiest animal on the planet?
brownchicken,browncow..... (said in a porno movie notion)
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XD-45 ACP Compact- TFO's XD-40 4-inch S&W 442 Mossberg 500 A  Charles Daly-12 guage CCW Holder NRA Member Future LEO (Currently in Academy Training) |
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04-19-2008, 07:18 PM
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#4 |
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XDTalk 1K Member
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Hey!!! There's a henweigh about to land on your head!!!
(you may replace "henweigh" with another word of your choice, I just don't feel like getting yelled at) 
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This is a perilous time, and more than ever, the world needs a united and strong America. If, God forbid, we live to see Mr. Obama president, we will live through a socialist era that America has not seen before, and our country will be weakened in every way. - Jon Voight |
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04-19-2008, 07:50 PM
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#5 |
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XDTalk 100 Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: FAR-- Nor-Cal
Posts: 160
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^^^^ i dont get it..... lol
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XD-45 ACP Compact- TFO's XD-40 4-inch S&W 442 Mossberg 500 A Charles Daly-12 guage CCW Holder NRA Member Future LEO (Currently in Academy Training) |
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04-20-2008, 11:37 AM
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#6 |
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XDTalk 500 Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Jacksonville, FL
Posts: 554
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It looks like all the jokes I know about people with missing appendages are mentioned on this thread. I heard a couple of new ones in here though. Good ones...
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XD 45 Tactical Taurus PT145 Stainless Mossberg 500 Winchester M70 XTR Sporter 270 My father's old JC Higgins 22 Red Rider BB (don't laugh...it'll put your eye out  ) There is no problem that cannot be solved by the use of high explosives. - Bumper Sticker |
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