On Choosing A Wife (NCS!!) - XDTalk Forums - Your HS2000/SA-XD Information Source!

**hacker15** · 01-07-2007, 03:48 PM

Choosing a wife

A man wanted to get married. He was having trouble choosing among three likely candidates. He gives each woman a present of $5,000 and watches to see what they do with the money.

The first does a total make over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon gets her hair done, new make up and buys several new outfits and dresses up very nicely for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much.

The man was impressed.

The second goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, an new XD .45 SC, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much.

Again, the man is impressed.

The third invests the money in the stock market. She earns several
times the $5,000. She gives him back his $5000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much.

Obviously, the man was impressed.

The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money he'd given her.

Then, he married the one with the biggest boobs.

Men are like that, you know.

Note:
There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research.

This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.

tec · 01-07-2007, 03:53 PM

kevin7 · 01-07-2007, 04:07 PM

I might end up being the first person to laugh to their deaths.

And it'll be your 'fault' hacker.

saw · 01-07-2007, 08:55 PM

do what

rimshot · 01-08-2007, 09:54 AM

Upon his return from a business trip the businessman's wife eagerly greets him at the front door.She is so excited that she can't tell her husband fast enough about her "surprise". She has been to the plastic surgeon"s office for a free "etimate and evaluation for breast enhancement surgery". It will only be $2500.00 per boob . I know how much you will enjoy them, I can't wait to show you! His reply , "why not rub Charman toilet tissue between your boobs, look what it did for you butt in 20 years !!!!Soo much for a warm welcome home!!!

jamstutz · 01-08-2007, 01:12 PM

An old bachelor uncle once told me, "Getting married is a lot like buying a lottery ticket. Sure, you might win the jackpot, but what are the odds?"

**XDAndMe** · 01-08-2007, 01:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jamstutz

An old bachelor uncle once told me, "Getting married is a lot like buying a lottery ticket. Sure, you might win the jackpot, but what are the odds?"

The only difference is a lottery ticket might only cost $1.00 whereas a poorly chosen wife can cost half your posessions and the kids.

That's an expensive lottery ticket. You'd think the odds were better

hellagerms · 01-08-2007, 03:45 PM

rimshot · 01-08-2007, 03:53 PM

after a year with both ,the dog is still happy to see you come home.

slugger6 · 01-08-2007, 04:42 PM

hacker15 - That brought a big smile to my face after a long day at work. Thanks!

01-07-2007, 03:48 PM	#1
hacker15 XDTalk 3K Member Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Upstate, NY Posts: 3,380	On Choosing A Wife (NCS!!) Choosing a wife A man wanted to get married. He was having trouble choosing among three likely candidates. He gives each woman a present of $5,000 and watches to see what they do with the money. The first does a total make over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon gets her hair done, new make up and buys several new outfits and dresses up very nicely for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much. The man was impressed. The second goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, an new XD .45 SC, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much. Again, the man is impressed. The third invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times the $5,000. She gives him back his $5000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much. Obviously, the man was impressed. The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money he'd given her. Then, he married the one with the biggest boobs. Men are like that, you know. Note: There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them. __________________ If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man. Mark Twain

01-07-2007, 03:53 PM	#2
tec XDTalk 5K Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Holland Ohio Posts: 8,643 Blog Entries: 1	__________________ Founding father of the "Post here if you want to increase your post count".

01-07-2007, 08:55 PM	#4
saw XDTalk 100 Member Join Date: May 2006 Location: Missouri, USA Posts: 108	do what __________________ SAW The Show Me State The better you are the better you will be, with more practice.

01-08-2007, 09:54 AM	#5
rimshot XDTalk Newbie Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 20	wife announces a "surprise" for hubbie!!! Upon his return from a business trip the businessman's wife eagerly greets him at the front door.She is so excited that she can't tell her husband fast enough about her "surprise". She has been to the plastic surgeon"s office for a free "etimate and evaluation for breast enhancement surgery". It will only be $2500.00 per boob . I know how much you will enjoy them, I can't wait to show you! His reply , "why not rub Charman toilet tissue between your boobs, look what it did for you butt in 20 years !!!!Soo much for a warm welcome home!!!

01-08-2007, 01:12 PM	#6
jamstutz XDTalk 100 Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: NE Indiana Posts: 178	On the subject of marriage... An old bachelor uncle once told me, "Getting married is a lot like buying a lottery ticket. Sure, you might win the jackpot, but what are the odds?"

01-07-2007, 04:07 PM	#3
kevin7 XDTalk 500 Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 761	I might end up being the first person to laugh to their deaths. And it'll be your 'fault' hacker.

01-08-2007, 03:45 PM	#8
hellagerms XDTalk 4K Member Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: In orbitals Posts: 4,252	Ha!

01-08-2007, 03:53 PM	#9
rimshot XDTalk Newbie Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 20	difference between a wife and your dog, after a year with both ,the dog is still happy to see you come home.

01-08-2007, 04:42 PM	#10
slugger6 XDTalk 10K Member Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Ohio Posts: 19,383	hacker15 - That brought a big smile to my face after a long day at work. Thanks!

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