Retirement can be fun....with the right hatThis is a discussion on Retirement can be fun....with the right hat within the XDTalk Chatter Box forums, part of the XD Talk category; A few days ago my best friend from high school sent me a 'Viet Nam Veteran' cap. I never had one of these before, and ...
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06-05-2012, 01:39 PM
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#1
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XDTalk 3K Member
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Location: Near the Black Hills of SD
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Retirement can be fun....with the right hat
A few days ago my best friend from high school sent me a 'Viet Nam Veteran' cap. I never had one of these before, and I was pretty hyped about it, especially because my friend was considerate enough to take the time to give it to me.
Yesterday, I wore it when I went to Walmart. There was nothing in particular that I needed at the world's largest retailer; but, since I retired, trips to Wally World to look at the Walmartians is always good for some comic relief. Besides, I always feel pretty normal after seeing some of the people that frequent the establishment. But, I digress...enough of my psychological fixations.
While standing in line to check out, the guy in front of me, probably in his early thirties, asked, "Are you a Viet Nam Vet?"
"No," I replied.
"Then why are you wearing that cap?"
"Because I couldn't find the one from the War of 1812."
I thought it was a snappy retort.
"The War of 1812, huh?" the Walmartian queried, "When was that?"
God forgive me, but I couldn't pass up such an opportunity.
"1936," I answered as straight-faced as possible.
He pondered my response for a moment and responded, "Why do they call it the War of 1812 if it was in 1936?"
"It was a Black Op. No one is supposed to know about it."
This was beginning to be way fun!
"Dude! Really?" he exclaimed. "How did you get to do something that COOOOL?"
I glanced furtively around me for effect, leaned toward the guy and in a low voice said, "I'm not sure. I was the only Caucasian on the mission."
"Dude," he was really getting excited about what he was hearing, "that is seriously awesome!
But, didn't you kind of stand out?"
"Not really. The other guys were wearing white camouflage."
The moron nodded knowingly.
"Listen man," I said in a very serious tone, "You can't tell anyone about this. It's still 'top secret' and I shouldn't have said anything."
"Oh yeah?" he gave me the 'don't threaten me look.'
"Like, what's gonna happen if I do?"
With a really hard look I said, "You have a family don't you?We wouldn't want anything to happen to them, would we?"
The guy gulped, left his basket where it was and fled through the door. By this time the lady behind me was about to have a heart attack she was laughing so hard.I just grinned at her.
After checking out and going to the parking lot I saw Dimwit leaning in a car window talking to a young woman. Upon catching sight of me he started pointing excitedly in my direction.Giving him another 'deadly' serious look, I made the 'I see you' gesture. He turned kind of pale, jumped in the car and sped out of the parking lot.
What a great time!
Tomorrow I'm going back with a Homeland Security cap.
(Wish I could take credit for this creative thinking, but it's someone else's story. If I told you who, I'd have to kill you.)
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There is no "Common Sense Gun Regulation". There is only unconstitutional gun restriction.
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06-05-2012, 02:17 PM
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#2
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XDTalk 100 Member
Member #: 72376
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Puget Sound Area
Posts: 182
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That is scary....he is probable on driving a car so look out
Sent from my 300 baud modem
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06-05-2012, 02:19 PM
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#3
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XDTalk 5K Member
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Location: Ohio
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I don't care who's story it is. It's a good one! LOL
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“If someone has a gun and is trying to kill you, it would be reasonable to shoot back with your own gun.” ― Dalai Lama XIV
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06-05-2012, 02:23 PM
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#4
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Old Timer
Member #: 65055
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Location: Ohio
Posts: 5,103
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That is funny. VERY funny. I love trolling stupid people.
(to a limit)
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The steel cannot be dulled, chipped or broken.
Its thrust is deep and causes agonizing pain.
Those struck with the dagger of truth
must come to terms with the wicked lies
within their heart and soul.
No matter where you run or hide, nor how deep you dig your foxhole...the big green weenie WILL find you.
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06-05-2012, 03:33 PM
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#5
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XDTalk Member
Member #: 74099
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 33
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LOL I know this stuff happens. I took a dryer cord to Home Depot to get a new one for my son the guy at the store asked is it elec. I told him no its coal fired we hook it to the belt on the John Deer. what a fool.
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06-05-2012, 04:21 PM
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#6
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XDTalk 100 Member
Member #: 24127
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: buffalo,new york
Posts: 399
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I could never do this. I'd be laughing too hard.Great story who ever it belongs to.
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06-05-2012, 04:35 PM
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#7
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XDTalk Member
Member #: 74088
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Kentucky
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After the Homeland Security cap, try one that says "undercover cop". 
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Give a man a beer, waste an hour. Teach a man to brew, and waste a lifetime!
Pretty women make us BUY beer. Ugly women make us DRINK beer. Good women want us to BREW beer.
(from Married with Children, but I added the last line)
A fine beer may be judged with only one sip, but it's better to be thoroughly sure.
All you need for happiness is a good gun, a good horse, and a good wife.
fellow Kentuckian Daniel Boone
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06-05-2012, 04:50 PM
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#8
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XDTalk 500 Member
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Location: Houston, TX
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I thought about getting g a cap that says Vietnam vet. My service was from 2002 - 2005. So I am a vet also I am Vietnamese. So I should totally qualify
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06-05-2012, 05:10 PM
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#9
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XDTalk 1K Member
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Location: DFW, Texas
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I also ask people if they are veterans when they wear veteran hats then I ask them on specifics if their answers don't make since I just take their hat from them. Its only happened once but Ill continue my reign of terror. A security guard was wearing a OIF hat and knew nothing about Iraq or what unit he was in while he was there.
Speaking of fake veterans there is this Black Ops Vet.
http://www.facebook.com/#!/photo.php...type=3&theater
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06-05-2012, 06:16 PM
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#10
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XDTalk 10K Member
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Location: South Louisiana
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Good laugh. Thanks.
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Retirement can be fun....with the right hat
