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The things we learned from the home invasion in Oklahoma

This is a discussion on The things we learned from the home invasion in Oklahoma within the XDTalk Chatter Box forums, part of the XD Talk category; What do you do when you have no choice but to use deadly force to protect your family? I think that the best way to ...

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Old 11-03-2010, 10:30 PM   #1
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The things we learned from the home invasion in Oklahoma

What do you do when you have no choice but to use deadly force to protect your family? I think that the best way to explain what we did is to use an outline.

Here is a list of things you need to do now to prepare for this:
· Have a plan on how you want the family to respond in case of such an event.
We had a “safe” room where the wife and kids would go while I provided cover but no plan on her being home alone.
· Look up, and interview a hand full of lawyers. Find one you are comfortable with and establish a report in the off chance you might need legal counsel.
We did not do this. I did have a name and contact information but had not gotten around to calling him yet.
· Be prepared to lose whatever weapon you use to police custody for a very long time.
Even though my wife was cleared of all charges, my gun will be in custody for at least two years according to the police department. The point here is to have another weapon because you will not feel safe without one.
· Check with your insurance company for the bio-hazard clean-up.
I got lucky here because I never thought of it before. Actually I don’t know for sure if any would not cover for something but it never hurts to ask.
· Take care of your friends! It is good to have them in times of trouble.
If you think it’s hard to find help moving, try getting out of your house in 10 hours when there is blood on the floor and nothing is packed.
· Find a safe location that you can stay at for at least a week.
<O</O
Short term priories:
· Make sure your family is safe first! Nothing else matters at this point.
· Get out of the area, the house, the city, and do not talk to the press.
My wife was told by our lawyer she needed to give a statement to the press. He made all the arrangements, screened all her answers, and made sure her face was hidden.
· Get supplies to last for a week (cloths, meds, kid’s favorite toys…)
· Find a place for household items.
I had the entire house into a storage unit within 12 hours of the first shot.
· Contact your Lawyer.
· Set up counseling, even if you don’t need it immediately after.
· Contact your homeowner’s insurance company and get the cleanup started and the house secured.

Long term goals:
· Is your house in an area you can go back to? If not then make sure you can afford to pay a mortgage and still have enough money left over to live somewhere else.
Mine is not. My neighbors support our actions but the other small time gang members do not.
· If possible get out of the area.
I moved 30 miles away and am actively looking to move out of the state. There is no way to put a price on peace of mind.
<O</O
Feel free to add to this or scrutinize our actions so that more people can learn what to do. I am proud of the way we handled ourselves during this trying time, but that doesn’t mean there is not a better way to do so.
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Old 11-03-2010, 10:37 PM   #2
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If I can do something to help you guys, let me know!

I live out in Choctaw.
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Old 11-04-2010, 04:25 AM   #3
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Thanks for sharing what you learned from this experience. I hope everything gets settled for you soon. How is your wife doing with the experience of shooting someone?
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Old 11-04-2010, 06:12 AM   #4
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Thanks for the info and advice. I can not add to this, you put it all in a nut shell. Glad to hear that it didn't get worse.

I feel for you and your family. I hope things smooth out faster than expected. You sound like a man with a strong will and a strong family.
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Old 11-04-2010, 07:43 AM   #5
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Excellent summary! Would you mind if I shared it on a couple other forums?
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Old 11-04-2010, 08:03 AM   #6
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This is great info from the horse’s mouth so to speak. I'm really sorry your wife was put in this position but from what I've read in the news (via your posts) she acted heroically.

Thank you for sharing. I'm pretty far away in Nebraska but let me know if there is anything we can do from here.
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Old 11-04-2010, 08:31 AM   #7
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Being the father of four, it's hard to imagine having to face a home invasion with any of my offspring at home. I live alone now, so I won't face that, unless the invasion happens while I'm visiting the kids.

About all we can do is to be vigilant. Dogs help, in my opinion. I live in a small town where the police wouldn't be too tough on me, should I have to use a firearm in self-defense in my home. I'd probably still take the precaution of talking with a lawyer. (Two of my offspring are lawyers. )

If the event happened while I was visiting kids in Atlanta, I'd be facing a whole other keg of worms.
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Old 11-04-2010, 08:41 AM   #8
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We have had two attempted break-ins in 5 years (thank god for metal re-inforced doors), so your story definitely hits close to home for me and my family. Thank you so much for sharing and thanks for the good advise.
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Old 11-04-2010, 08:57 AM   #9
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Thanks for sharing. I had a friend that shot and killed a PCP user in his house (2 to the chest, 1 to the head when the first two .45acps failed to stop him). He had the lawyer already lined up. The thing he said that you did not -- Give no statement to the police until your lawyer is there. He called 911 reported the shooting, then immediately called his lawyer who showed up 30 min later (3am). Since most home defense shootings will occur early morning, make sure you have a lawyer on retainer that will make the house call to protect you FROM the police after you protect your family from the BG!! My friend was charged with murder because of the head shot. The charges were dropped when the lab results came back positive for PCP, which supported his story of the guy being told to leave, charging him, getting one COM, charging again and getting closer, getting a second one COM, charging again and getting to 5' where the 1 to the head stopped the action.

It's sad that you have to move to protect yourself from further harm. Did the gangs slowly creep in and change the area dynamic or were you aware of them when you moved in? (I understand being only able to afford so much!) Many gangs are national or even international and they have an internal wanted list. They may have local "chapters" where you are moving to. Dunno, but it would be wise to investigate. Maybe wise to clean up your online persona so they can't track you.

Paranoid? That's not the question. The question is, "Are you paranoid enough?"


On a looking back view. My friend said that his wife came to grips with the incident after ripping up the old floors, getting new floors and all new furniture. Even 15 years after the incident (when he told me about it), he said he still wakes up in a cold sweat 2-3 times week.
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Old 11-04-2010, 09:21 AM   #10
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Could you relate the distances, and shots fired by your wife please?
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